whats worse than worrying? having to worried over distance and being helpless about it! It sucks being thousands of km away from home. Phone and internet doesnt do much, i cant assert my ‘power’ over the phone or net, its not ‘threatening’ enough..
thats why i need to be physically home..
5 more weeks..and till then, i hope, my emails and phone calls will have to do the job..
You know what they say about winter..makes people depress and vulnerable. I am feeling it. It doesnt help that it has been raining (and hailing too).
Just kind of tired of leaving alone overseas for now. I know that when i leave this place for good, i will miss it. But being alone consecutive for months, away from family, away frm the boi, away from ur closest friends really sucks. When the road gets tough here, you just face it alone. Don’t have mummy’s soup, daddy’s crappy jokes, a hug frm the boy, a shopping trip with the best frens that will always make you laugh..
I am not facing any tough road or what.. its just that i miss singapore, i miss my family, my boi and my frens. I want to see them, poke them instead of just dreaming of them.. I need the physical presence..
ya i know i just have go through it.. its my 3rd year here and i am going back in july..but haiz..this moment. for now.. how?
understand ma?
its almost the end of the holidays. And on monday school starts for me again and i will have to power it through till exams. And the holidays had perfect weather, 22 -27 degrees.. and now just like holidays are ending, the perfect weather has turned around and left. Its a freaking 12 degrees now.. tomorrow’s max will only be 14 means it will single digit coldness for most of the day…
havent been doing much just analysisng old people’s and aphasic language and getting a very big headache from counting the lexical measurements.. Its worse when they are unintelligible.. -x
have been into a baking frenzy on this second week. baked bacon,corn and cheese muffins. baked butter cake as i missed it. baked egg tarts as i missed it too. i miss too much food back home.. i think i am overloading myself with sugar.. ha! And i will have 6 original krispy kremes airflown to me later..so..more overload! its ok to indulge in these stuff when you are away from home! -x
gaaa i really miss my frens back home.. yesh all of u..
its the 6th week of school here! And next week i will have 2 weeks of holidays. Unfortunately i don’t call them holidays cos i have a pile! YESH a pile of assignments and work to go through. I have to transcribed aphasic speech and i just listened to it just know, its barely intelligible.. ARGH.. now i know i should not do adults. Imagine in spore, a mix of dialects and singlish, haa how am i suppose to analyse into just the basic mean length of utterances. No wonder, no1 cares about speech and language therapy in adults in spore!
haiz there goes my hols. Been trying to organise my timeline for next 2 years as i ,unfortunately, is overloading my degree with my honours. I have no more summer holidays cos they are now reserved for my placements. I have been trying to organise and get the ball rolling, but it gets so annoying when the formal details are not formalised by the institution. So now i am stuck at my timeline.. argh its so frustrating that i spend 2/3 of my time settling admin stuff. i am suppose to study!!!! sorry i am just whining.. i get annoyed when things get stuck.
dunno dunno dunno whether shld i go back in july cos i definately have to do placements in nov08 to feb09. but if i can do in spore den i no need go back in july. but given the rate things are getting settled, it seems like i should jus go back home first. argh… n this is the only tiny part of my delimma! i have many other factors and issues.
kinda of hope sometimes i am not alone here. its so hard to settle everything yourself.
And it doesnt help that my frens are 1 by 1 going back to singapore or their home for good! rahh… soon i will be left with frens that i can count with my fingers! RAH..
Bye cassie, teresa, xiuli, junhui, charlotte.. haik
But fortunately i have an air-conditioner in my living room. So all my studying has been shifted to there since it is on 24 hours a day cos of the crazy heat! And fortuantely my room is nearest to the living room so i can open my door and let the cool air seep into my room. Due to the crazy heatwave outside, i have tried and tested plenty of solutions/ways to keep the room cool and here are my takes on it
1) Do not on ur lights in your room! keep it dark. light bulbs create more heat!
2) Close ur blinds! keep ur window shut and only opening it in the evening!
3)hang wet cloths near the window! helps keep the air coming in cool
4) as the bed is crazily trapping all the heat, lay a damp towel on the bed for 30 mins b4 sleep. n viola! cool bed for u to sleep on when u remove it
5) Do not on the fan in the room during the day, only circulate hot air n make it feel hotter.
I have been drinking so much water, barely water, cooling pear drink but i think due to the heat i lost weight again.. this is bad cos if this continues i will disappear into thin air.. i am eating very well too.. well you all shall see in my next post the amount of food i am gourging myself with..
Anyway as i sat in the living room studying, looking out of the balcony , into the crazy heatwave.. i missed home even more! 2 weeks le.. yea i am ok.. but i feel that i am just displaced from home. I feel like my whole body was taken out of spore to here without its consent. And i have to adapt to it.. yesh i am adapting but still miss home.. everything is so familiar here.. i am still stayin in the same old room same old place.. ppl are still here.. but is so not like home..
i am a home girl eh..
4th day here. I have unpacked everything, bought all my groceries and necessities. Went for the first placement at Chrities on thur, did 2 therapy session plans already going to see my clients and assess them next week. It is going to be a step step learning curve for me. But i think i will enjoy it.
The first night back here was shit. I was crying and crying. My room didnt feel like my room cos deco has not been up yet until the second night. Cried to my boy and whined that i am not suited for overseas studying and why am i over here again! No family here, no boy here, i cannot survive. But i guess it was the transition period, i felt that i just left this lonely place not long ago so what i doing back here again. ARgh.. but alright.. cried to sleep and i guess i was really exhausted cos the next thing i know it was morning. Been feeling much better these few days, almost normal ->. I guess i have to move on eh so i can return home faster too.
Yes and to cheer myself up further i went out for a chocolate feast! argh.. haha.. i ordered a dessert platter! hahahahah. It was actually to celebrate connie’s bday so below are the pics.. haha which i can only provide links till i bother resizing them.
Bye Bye Singapore, bye bye my family, bye bye my boy, bye bye my frens.. I am off to Adelaide once again. I will miss the company, the warmth, the comfort, my princess room. My heart always whinches when i leave, it feels heavy and sad. Dunno when i will be back again, hopefully soon.
I will miss the sights and sounds of the buzzing city as i live among a tempertate forest with wild spiders and snakes.. haa ( ok nicer things are kola, ducks and kangaroo).
Hear from me soon, i promise i will update when i am there (of cos i have nothing to do there -<)..
okoko i will take care of myself too!
I am sick and tired of blogspot’s tiny framwork, or should i say all skins in blogspots are tiny!!! (maybe i dunno how to choose). After seeing kl’s and wanni’s blog, i have decided to switch to wordpress, the space is much bigger, easier to upload things. Still figuring out how to use this so there are any mistakes please guide me!!
oh yes in case anyone is wondering, those are my eyes up there.. in other words what i type here is through my perspective, through my eyes ->
Unfortunately i am leaving sunny singapore in a week’s time to oven-baked adelaide. Sigh how time passes! Every1 was saying “aiayh 3 months, v long leii”.. No its freaking short! Am i ever ready to return to Adelaide, the ans will always be NO! Maybe not alot of you know about it but i am sucker for home. Been having nightmares about leaving Singapore, sometimes i get all emotional and cry at night. I hate packing and the thought of dragging out my boxes from storage to unpack in Adelaide irks me further. But i know i will live through it. Well i am now officially a 3rd year student, so inlcuding this year its only 2 more years! Hopefully many things will work out in Aus and may things go smoothly so i can frequently come back home (if i take my honours offer and base my thesis in spore).
ok back to my life or let’s say my eyes! Haa.. i went to chingay with boy aka ‘monster’ and his family. pcitures on facebook. I dunno how to upload pics to here yet..still figuring it out! RAH.. (it seems like i have to re-size my photos so that a thumbnail version can be uploaded.. is it the case?)
